Divine

I am not much of a sweet eater. I appreciate something delicious every now and then but not that often.  If you place a piece of pizza and a cupcake in front of me 9 times out of 10 I will choose the pizza. Why 9 times out of 10 you ask? That is because if that one time was a piece of Nikki Hoffman's Divine Chocolate Cake I would snatch it up in a hurry. When I say divine I mean deadly; I mean absolutely delicious too good to be true.  It tastes like the chocolate cake of a hostess cupcake. I know you know what I'm talking about,  the one with the 7 white loops on top. One trip to the wonderbread store leaves me 5 pounds heavier. 

UGH thats what I'm talkin' about. 900 calories worth of deliciousness. And Nikki Hoffman has perfected it. God knew what he was thinkin' when he made her my momma. Thank you.


If she can make the tiny swirls,  I'll kiss her feet. You have my word. 

Not everyone believes it can happen, but I am a believer!  In fact, it has happened to me five times in my life.

 My first real case occurred when I was just 17 or 18.  I happened by a 16 and under baseball game to watch some old family friends play baseball.  To my surprise, on that team was one of the most attractive young men I had ever seen.  He was tall, lean, and very comfortable on the baseball field.  He had a great swing! I remember noticing him when he was in the batter’s circle taking a few practice swings.  We made eye contact and I just knew.  Something happened to me.  I didn’t see fireworks, stars or lightening strikes but I knew right then we were going to be together.  That evening, I told my mom, I was going to marry him.  Well, needless to say, I kept Glenn in the back of my mind but never forgot him.  After he graduated from high school I did a little chasing and he finally asked me out! We’ve been together ever since, 28 years, and I plan to spend the rest of my life with him. My first case of love at first sight!

            My second, third, and fourth cases happened when I delivered my girls.  I remember each of their beautiful faces and the since of euphoria they brought to me when I saw them for the first time.  Although each of them was different in their own way, they shared common characteristics.  All of them had similarities that reminded me of Glenn, which made me love them and him even more.  Dusti, Karli, and Kami have each brought so much joy and laughter to my life. I treasure them, so much so, that I tear up just thinking about losing them. I am most proud of the fact that each of them is a truly good and kind soul. I am honestly honored to be their mother.

            Love at first sight has happened again! I was warned by my grandmotherly friends that my life was about to change in a wonderful way, but I didn’t understand how anything could compare to the love that I feel for my girls. My first grandbaby, Jayci June Johnson, was recently born. The strangest thing happened when I looked at her darling face for the first time as she lay in the arms of my gorgeous daughter. I think I did see stars or at least little pink hearts! I believe Jayci is the definition of beautiful. Her tiny hands and feet are just precious. She coos and my heart skips a beat as I listen. I sit and imagine the experiences we will have together and the memories that I hope to help her to make. She is perfect and I know she will bring even more joy to our happy family.

            For me, love at first sight is a real thing.  It is that moment when your heart totally falls for someone and you know your life will never be the same again. I have been truly blessed with a generous share of these moments.  I thank God for each of them and for the future my family will share together.

           - Nikki aka Gigi 

delicious but vicious.

If you don't appreciate butter don't even bother reading this post. You may gain weight just by looking at the pictures.

I decided to try Pioneer Woman's cinnamon rolls  . BIG MISTAKE. These are the most ooey gooey delicious thing I have ever eaten. They also happen to probably be about 2,000 calories each. And I'm not joking. These could be deadly, especially for people like my dad who ate 5 as soon as I pulled them out of the oven.

So here it is... the ooey gooey experience. Enjoy.

LOOK at all that butter.... thats one stick, melted. (more was added when no one was looking)

Now, if you really want everyone in your family to hate you this is the next step. This measuring cup was filled with one half stick of melted butter. Not only was there glass EVERYWHERE but the floor is still kind of yucky in some places. I've cleaned it 1000 times!







but this.... makes it all worth it!!! MMMM! For all the steps, check out Pioneer Woman's Blog

cacti queen.

While on vacation we found a cacti greenhouse in Tuscon, Arizona.  We were making fun of it at first but it turned out being pretty spectacular. On the way there grandma asked grandpa if he wanted to go see the cacti. He said no because he thought she was saying "cateyes." He was not interested in visiting any kind of cateyes. He seemed terrified. 

Apparently there are a lot of different varieties of cacti that none of us knew about. 

So we bought a bunch of little ones for everyone as souvenirs  and we got some for ourselves. My mom thought she had the perfect place to plant hers. In some homemade terrarium. She gave me this tiny little glass bowl that was a hand-me-down from dusti's wedding. Well the joke is on you momma. IM THE CACTI QUEEN and the "terrarium" is TERRible. Today I had to go show it to my mom and I told her that I was just going to have to buy a new bowl because it was getting so big. sucker! 

would you rather get a cactus from someone whose looked like this... (notice the bottom half of the tall one is completely dead) 

OR THIS?!?!?! I know, right?! 

Who has two green thumbs and grows the best cactus??... THIS GIRL! 

Kami- 1 

Mom - 0 

Baby Love.

Jayci June Johnson = precious!

Because of my exhausting schedule, I simply have not been able to write on this blog. You would find that humorous if you knew of what my schedule consisted:

• 10:00 am            wake up 
• 10:02 am            go back to sleep
• 11:30 am            wake up
• 11:31- 1:00 pm  get up, talk to mom, play on computer
• 1:00-2:00 pm     sleep 
• 2:00 pm              go out in the backyard to layout 
• 2:15 pm              crawl inside due to heat stroke

And play with Jayci or Jake the rest of the day. Jayci obviously gets priority.

Oh and speaking of Jayci... she was born. wooo hooo!

So lets think about something that really boggles my mind almost as much as the sun... 
(huge ball of fire creating light for us and literally burning our skin as if we were on huge world rotisserie... we will talk about this later because you are now also thinking it is strange) 


back on topic- BABIES!  Life is starting to freak me out lately. So here is this tiny little thing the size of a grain of rice inside Dusti's body. It grows. It turns into a baby living inside of her.  One day this "baby" decides to come out of her body and we love it. In ten years it walks, talks, goes to school, has friends... WEIRD. THAT THING WAS IN HER BODY! Just think about it. You know thats kinda crazy. I look at my mom and think whoa... I lived inside your bod for 9 months. baha. Ok i'll stop being a crazy person now.

Although its strange, this is the most precious baby I've ever seen.

So now we have no topic of conversation in our household that doesn't involve baby. The most exciting thing going on at 12:30 am is Dusti calling everyone telling them not to worry because she finally pooped! (Jayci, not Dusti) We are baby loving robots. I think about her all day long. We fight about who gets to hold her (even when she has the worst gas ever), who gets to give her a bath and even who gets to change her diaper.

I'm starting to feel unloved and it is obvious that Guinness (Dusti and CJ's dog) is feeling the same way. First, me- Grandma has called me her baby for the past 22 years. She no longer does. AND the other day Jayci's hand/arm was peeling where she sucked on it and mom was sooooo concerned about it. She didn't even care when I told her that I was also peeling.

Now, Guinness- He runs around at grandma's all the time, never causing trouble. We were down there the other night and he ran out in the street where cars had to dodge him. He was obviously trying to commit puppy suicide because he also feels he has been replaced. He needs puppy therapy.  

When taking these lovely pictures of Jayci ( am i a professional baby photographer ?! ... maybe) I grabbed some things of my own to prop her up on and she peed- all over one of my fav pillows. So, of course, I called her a little bitch. Dusti and Mom were a little shocked, who could call a 5 day old a bitch? I CAN. And she better get used to it, thats for sure. No more peeing on Aunt Kami's stuff or stealing all my momma's love you little sassy pants. Maybe i'll like her more when she is in the 5th-6th grade and in her awkward stage. It will be my time to shine again. haha only kidding. I love the little baby nugget. Even if she does have Old Man toots.

-kami

Yummy and disastrous recipes to come.

It says a lot about a person and family when you walk into their house and smell something cooking. To me it says comfort, laughter, closeness and stories to tell. My sisters and I have been in the kitchen with my mom since I can remember. And by that I mean we were eating the food while she cooked. Kitchens bring memories. During a get together in our family typically everyone congregates in the kitchen. That is until my mom gets too hot, freaks out and demands that everyone leave. (very common) 

Look even dad helps out. He is unwrapping reese's for a batch of the 500+ cookies we made for Dusti's wedding. (I wouldn't suggest that) 

It can become such an easy escape from the mess and mayhem to pick up the phone and order out, especially on holidays or family get togethers. Even as lazy as I am, the idea of eating catered food on thanksgiving makes me sad. Sure, its fast and easy and would probably save our families from some scary menu disasters - but where is the fun in that?! Don't let me lead you astray... i don't do any of the cooking for holidays! Usually mom gets up at about 330 or some ridiculous hour and cooks up a feast for the next day.  There always seems to be some extra clanking going on in the kitchen when she is up that early. That my friends is what he call sleep sabotage. Her plan is to be as loud as possible because if she has to be up, so does everyone else.

My mom has never been a recipe user. Most of her day to day meals she makes from whatever she has lying around. I'll search the cabinets, fridge and freezer for anything -she will come in and whip up something delicious out of nothing. 

Anyone can cook. Those who say they can't are crazy! If you can follow a few simple directions, you can make a delicious meal in no time. You don't have to try to be a chef or make something fancy - the simple recipes are usually better anyway. I just got the Pioneer Woman Cookbook. MMMMMMMM. If you have beef, butter, flour and whipping cream you can make just about anything in her cookbook. (ok not really) You may gain 20 pounds but your soul will be happy :) I recommend it to everyone! I feel like if she gave me a chance the Pioneer Woman and I would be best friends. 

Go buy this cookbook, seriously. I read it cover to cover, its hilarious. I can't decide what is more delicious... the recipes or the pictures of cowboys wearing chaps and wranglers. (yum) 

Karli already mentioned about everything that could go wrong in recipes we are trying. Fallen cakes and not-so-yummy looking food. Well, at least it will make for funny pictures. (Fallen cakes are usually the most delicious anyway) 

A new one to train.

Poor dad. He grew up with only one girl in his life, his mother. Living with two brothers and his dad on a farm he'd probably say his life was perfect. Enter Nikki and three beautiful babies. That is, three little girls. I'm sure when they found out they were having a third (me) his praying knees were sore. Praying, begging, pleading for a boy.

So here we have Glenn, a man's man. Who loves working, being outside and only sits down long enough to eat and watch John Wayne. Not anymore :)

We have him trained. We have actually tricked him into thinking he enjoys romantic comedies. He is honestly the best dad and father anyone could ask for even if he does enjoy tickling us until we cry, chasing us around the house with dead spiders or scaring the pee out of us when we were late for curfew. (Thats a whole 'nother story) Just when we think our plan has worked, we have conquered this man, he melts in the palm of our hands.... ENTER CJ.

Dusti's Husband (she will always be a Hoffman). Funny, quirky, pretty dang good lookin (awkward?) and manly. NO BUENO for our plan. The fridge is now ALWAYS stocked with beer to share with CJ.

However, we have a secret weapon. Enter Jayci June Johnson. Well, not yet but she will probably be born tomorrow (hopefully for Dusti's sanity). A sweet little baby girl. hmmm... these always do the trick.

Soon enough we can send her to CJ and Glenn to ask for the credit card and for them to take us on a cruise. (My many attempts this  year have failed) Actually baby signs are a big hit... I'm going to look up the sign for "cruise" and  "pretty please daddy."

Tata...



p.s. Looks like we won't have to work as hard as we thought...